


Bugged

by Birdbitch



Category: DCU
Genre: M/M, Pre-Reboot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-29
Updated: 2011-07-29
Packaged: 2018-01-17 08:18:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1380583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Birdbitch/pseuds/Birdbitch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Since Bruce has gotten back, he and Dick have had sex all of two times.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bugged

**Author's Note:**

> Crossposted to Tumblr. Originally posted on July 29, 2011. I think this was probably the first explicitly Bruce/Dick story I posted online.

He loves the kid. He really does. He’s like a son to him and he’s precious and they have a very good relationship as a consequence of having worked as Batman and Robin together. 

But, the problem is, Damian is a cockblocker—Jason’s words, not Dick’s. Dick would never refer to Damian as such, even if that is exactly what he is doing.

Since Bruce has gotten back, he and Dick have managed to have sex all of two times. They started on 28 different occasions, and each time it was stopped because Damian had a nightmare and needed to climb into his father’s bed. Sometimes, Dick has to wonder if he is doing it on purpose, considering how often it happens, but then he brushes the thought off and says, “Come on Damian. You can sleep in the middle.” After all, how often did he climb into Bruce’s bed with the same complaints of nightmares? 

"I don’t think he’s cockblocking you," Jason says one night, and Dick shoots him a look. "I think he’s actually cockblocking Daddy.” 

"You’re gross." Dick doesn’t really like that line of thinking. Like, at all. 

"What? He sees you as like, his dad now, or something. Nobody wants their dad getting fucked. And," Jason continues, taking a long drag off of his cigarette, "he’s not nearly as dumb as he looks." And Jason’s gone and that’s when Dick really does have to think about what Jason said. 

"B?" he speaks into his communicator. It’s a closed line, but still. Sometimes, there are things even Babs can’t catch the second they hit the firewall.

"Yeah?"

"There aren’t any cameras in the master suite, are there?" 

***

He gets home, and Bruce is having a loud, angry talk with Damian in the Batcave about privacy. The irony is hardly lost on Dick, but that’s not the point. He peels off his mask and the shouting dies down when Bruce catches him in the corner of his eyes. “Bruce, I’ll take care of this.”

"I have it handled."

"If you’re shouting like that, I really doubt how much of a handle you’ve got. I’ll see you upstairs, Bruce." He catches Bruce just as he passes him and kisses his cheek. Damian has a cringe that he can’t stop in time, and Jason, it would appear, was right. "Damian?"

"It was for your protection." 

And at that moment, Dick almost wants to not be mad at him and hug him because he does actually believe Damian. But he can’t. “You can’t put cameras in a person’s bedroom, Damian. Even if you want to protect them.”

He doesn’t bring up the fact that if anything were to go wrong, Bruce would probably be there. Or, that he could probably defend himself. 

"Father does."

And Dick laughs. “Damian, your dad really isn’t the ideal to look up to. He tried pulling that on me, too, and you know what I did?”

Damian glances up at him, finally. “What?”

"I ran away." He sighs and pulls Damian into a hug even if he probably shouldn’t because the look the kid gives him is too much. "Just please don’t do it again? Sometimes people need their privacy. We don’t have any cameras in your room." 

Damian leans against him and yawns. “You always sounded like you were in pain. I don’t want Father hurting you.”

Dick is mortified. “Damian, that’s—Oh, God, Damian, that’s not what it—”

"I knew exactly what was going on, Richard. I’m not an idiot." Damian snorts and pulls away. "I’m going to bed. Tell Father I apologize."

Dick knows that he should run and tell Bruce immediately, but he can’t really will himself to move from the spot. He’s too busy trying to process what Damian just said.


End file.
